Emily's turn

I tried to put a slideshow on here, hope it works. Well, I covered Steven and Kirkland so I will move onto Emily.
Emily is our 8-going-on-30 year old. I call her my "mini-me." Sometimes it's just like someone cloned me. Everyone says she favors me the most out of all of them, but I honestly think Jay favors me more. I absolutely adore the sprinkle of freckles across her nose. While she isn't always very photogenic, sometimes when she's sitting there it takes my breath away she's so pretty.
I'm sitting here on this rainy cold ooky day and I'm actually finding it kind of hard to write about Emily. I mean, there's tons I could say about her but I don't know how to say them without either a, sounding like one mean hateful mother; or b, sounding like I have put her on a pedestal and I'm bragging. Also there is this problem that Emily is just like me. Just like me. It's scary. Our relationship is complex and complicated and some of you are thinking, "she's 8." And if that is what you are thinking then it just shows you haven't gotten to know Emily very well.
I guess the bragging first. Emily was a beautiful baby. But my first month with her was ROUGH. Talk about high-maintenance..... I swear I nursed that baby 24 hours a day with occasional breaks. But after that, things evened out and she was just wonderful. Emily shocked us because she was speaking in sentences at 18 months and we were coming off of Kirkland who didn't talk hardly until she was almost 4. So seeing this little thing walking and talking was almost funny to us. She has continued this same path. She is a genius and it is amazing to me sometimes to see how her mind works and how quickly it picks up on things. I was told by one of her teachers, speaking under the promise of anonymity that she had the highest IQ in her grade. I don't know if that was true then (last year) or if it still is, but I could believe it. One thing Emily has that I never did is she LOVES math and is outstanding in it. This past summer she worked Kirkland's whole 3rd grade math workbook for the fun of it. The lowest grade she's ever brought home on her report card was a 96 I think. On top of being ridiculously smart, she has the maturity to go with it. You can carry on an intelligent, mature conversation with Emily. Sometimes I think her mind is more 12 or 13 years old instead of 8. Sometimes its kinda freaky. And then on top of all of this, with everyone (outside of us) she is always polite, quiet, sweet, friendly, helpful, etc, etc, etc. She has never gotten in trouble for behavior, talking, anything. So everywhere she goes, people just love Emily. She's quiet and shy to the point I told her she's starting to look like a snob! :)
Ok, so now for the bad parts where I sound terrible. She can be the most hateful child. Now she would never be that way at school or church or anything, just generally at home. She can be so ugly to me or Kirkland or Jay. Just that teenager attitude that she knows more than we do. She knows exactly how to torture Kirkland...... I realize some of that is typical sibling stuff. She is incredibly strong willed. Has been since she was a baby. We had a whole battle with her when she was about 18 months old over my niece's bottle and that child never did give in. We should've known then. Clothes, for instance. If I pick something out, she's not going to be wearing it. If I pick out 5 of her favorite outfits, she will still change something before she'll wear any of them. The other day we had WW III over the fact that I wanted her to wear a shirt under a shirt.... she was convinced she looked stupid..... I thought she looked so cute I took her picture. And you know what?? Most of the time whatever it is she is battling me over not wanting to wear, she winds up loving it. Not that she would ever admit it. Emily also has this way of talking to me so disdainfully..... she can make me feel like a complete failure as a mother. I have to remember that she is just pushing my buttons and let it go, but it's so hard not to kill her sometimes! :)
Emily loves soccer. She's not the greatest player on the field, but her love for it makes her a good player. The child cannot play offense, but she is great on defense. She loves to play defender and goalie. Her coaches have told me before she really does have a gift for defense, but she needs to continue to work on it. She was on the traveling challenge team last year, but I don't know if she'll do that this year.
She has two very bestest friends, Grace and Maggie. If she could spend every weekend with one or the other, I'm pretty sure she would. She is quite the social butterfly.... she likes to socialize, and be around people, and do things. She is very tender hearted (even if she is hateful!), and simply dotes on animals. She isn't afraid of any of them I don't think, and she is so good with them.
I have a lot of guilt where Emmy is concerned. I know that I expect more out of her and sometimes maybe put too much on her. I trust her too much and count on her too much. She gets so frustrated having to help with Kirkland so much and I understand that, but I still need her help. She helps out more around the house and more with the boys. I probably let her get away with more sometimes just because I have a lot of guilt because I know I put a lot on her. But just like William said this past weekend, I assure you, if Emily doesn't want to do it, she doesn't. So while I do count on her and expect her help alot, she wants to give it most of the time.
She doesn't miss a thing. She is very observant, understanding, and inquisitive. She loves her family very much and was extremely close to JC. In the weeks that JC was in Batesville before she went to Sanctuary, anytime we were up there Emily stayed right by her. She retrieved things for her, fixed her drinks, talked and visited with her....... she just adored her JC. She is so much like her, too. Strong willed, intelligent, kind hearted. She also loved being with my PawPaw. She loves to fish, read (she'll knock out a chapter book a day if we'd let her), scrapbook and make stuff, garden.......
I love her so much. I had to do an in-class poem the other day and I wrote about the shirt war.... I had a line in there that I can't remember exactly and I don't have it in front of me but the gist of it was that it is so hard to raise a child so like oneself..... continually walking a line between bliss and failure. and it really, really is.

For all of you who make fun of my garage saling and junk shopping....

Now see some of y'all like to make fun of me for getting up at 5:30 am on Saturdays and heading out yard saling and so I'm gonna do a quick entry to show you why I do! And go to Caledonia and West Point "junkin" too. The absolutely gorgeous window above was found behind a barn in Montpeiler, MS. I was on way home from my sister's house last November and this lady had all this old antique stuff at a yard sale out in front of this huge barn. I stopped, and looked around, and didn't find too much for me. But when I was turning around behind the barn to leave I saw TWO of these windows behind the barn. I immediately went and asked about them.... and left with them both for seventy dollars!!!! Yes, you read that right. Today, one is on my wall and Tamar has the other and it sits on top of her entertainment center. William and I don't like where ours is so we're actually prob gonna move it soon.
This is one awesome lamp that was exactly the right size I needed for a spot in my living room. It is actually made of washers, but I didn't notice. William figured it out. (anna, you'll appreciate this) The bottom and the ball in the middle match a floor lamp I found for half off in the Delta back in May. Needless to say I was psyched when I picked it up at one of my fave stores in the world, "Bits and Pieces" in West Point for TWELVE BUCKS.




This is Bubba curled up with one of my latest finds. I wish I had a picture of this window where you could see the colors, because they are really pretty. William is going to hang it above my kitchen sink and when he does I'll take another pic. This was picked up at a yard sale here in town for ten bucks..... along with a Southern Living door bucket for $3.



Ah, one of the greatest finds ever. At mine and Tamar's favorite store, 3 Sisters (in Caledonia) we found these stools. They were exactly what we needed for our stage for KidStuf. If you ever are anywhere near Caledonia, you must go in this store. I have some other pics from there that I will use in another blog when I feel like being funny. (i'm kinda sick tonite I think. Not sure what's up.) Anyway, Grant and Jeff Smith got bases welded on them in no time and now they sit on our stage!

So, if any of you are ever looking for anything, you need to just tell me. I will find it. I saw in Southern Living that this woman has a job workin with Interior Designers doing just that. Now it's ridiculous that I don't have that job!!!! And again, if you've laughed at my little shopping ventures, you just keep right on laughing. :)

The Durrs go to the Debate!!!!

I made my font a little bigger cause I think it was hard to read before, especially in my more lengthy posts! :)
As most of you are aware, the first Presidential Debate of 2008 was held at Ole Miss. We had really considered going to Oxford to watch it, but just hadn't made a decision. Well, about 3:00 that afternoon when we picked up the girls we stopped by our house, threw blankets and lawn chairs in the truck, and headed off to Oxford. Now someone asked us if we really thought we could get in to watch it. Well no. We're not stupid. But we'd read that they were showing it in the Grove and on the Square, so we wanted to be there. This just isn't something that comes to Mississippi, or anywhere, very often. We wanted to be a part of it, and wanted our children to be a part of it.
It was great, it was exciting, it was full of Obama fans!!! :) MTV was there with Rock the Debate. We saw lots of tv sets, but not the big guys (Fox, NBC, CBS, etc) because they were in the secured area. My kids did well and seemed to understand that this was something important. When it was over as we were walking around, we were interviewed by Dutch television!!!! It was so funny. William told him he was an independent. HA! I had to look down so they couldn't see me laughing. Then they talked to me... I can't remember what he asked but I told them that my son was entering the military and I just felt more comfortable with McCain in charge rather than Obama. I could've killed William for even telling the guy we would do it.
After the debate we also took the time to walk around the campus some. William showed the kids where his mom's office was and we took pics at that big ole fountain.... I'm sorry it prob has some important name but I've just never spent a lot of time on the campus. It's a beautiful place... I've always said that. And that fountain is really gorgeous. So here are some pics from the nite:



This was as close as you could get to the building. It was this huge security checkpoint with Secret Service, etc.


Emily did enjoy a book for part of it! (by the way, shout out to Paoli.... she is working her way through all the Babysitter's Club books!)




Oh yeah.... forgot to mention that we jumped this barricade in a back parking lot and stood on a hill and watched the motorcades leaving!!! My children were most impressed! This is our law abiding police officer lifting his son's stroller over the barricade! ha!



3 of the Durr children at the first 2008 Presidential Debate.





This is for our Ole Miss alumni...... here we are in front of the pretty fountain. :) love y'all.

Workshop (aka A Horror Story)

Geez louise I have not been good at the whole blog thing..... and I've had some GREAT stuff to blog about lately, just no time to do it. But this week on the calendar is pretty much wide open for me so I'm hoping to get in maybe 2 - 3 blogs this week. Yeah, but don't hold your breath or anything!!! I'm munching on some tasty sugar free candy and sipping my coffee and trying to decide.... do I want to talk about Dr. Skinny first, KidStuf last nite, or the antique trips/garage sale finds????? Ok, since I've had requests for Dr. Skinny I'll do that. But I'll have you know I have to get up from my comfy spot on the couch and walk all the way (like 20 feet) to my truck to get my notebook from class to do it. Sigh.
Alrightty. Well, on 9/25 I had to have my short story "workshopped." What that means is this: we had to write an 8 - 10 page short story that couldn't be a love story or horror or something.... just had to be realistic fiction. Then you give everyone a copy and the next class they come in and we get in a circle and they critique it. They also go over their copy of it and make notes, corrections, etc. They also write you a letter about what they thought. While they're doing the in-class critique, you are supposed to sit there and not talk. You don't get a rebuttal!!!! :) I was absolutely terrified about going into my workshop. I don't take criticism well!!! Also remember, like the two boys in the class I am a novelty. I'm not 19. I've got kids. So I already feel like I either just blend into the wall for them or for some of them, they find me somewhat of a spectacle. But I was just scared that they wouldn't like it, or wouldn't get it...... yeah, I was right.
Well that morning for workshop I basically made the decision to look down and look like I was writing the whole time because you are supposed to be taking notes, etc. So what I'm going to do here is give you the train of thought I was having through the whole process, because I wrote it all down!!! But before I do, I need to give you a little background on some of the "characters" in my class. You all know Dr. Skinny. Well there is also "Miss Superiority." She is just one of those people who thinks they are far more superior to anyone else in the class. Whatever she says or writes is something all of us should pay special attention to.... oh and she has been abroad and no one else has so that immediately makes her better than everyone else as well! Her story was just an extension of that ..."look at me! look how special i am! i've been abroad! i'm so pretty! aren't you jealous???" Then there is Mag. I love Mag. At first I thought that she could be annoying.... she would talk too much, or that she over-explained things, or that she was totally in to the shock factor. Mag writes exotic/ fantasy stories I think. But she has become someone I'm just thrilled to see walk in the door. She makes me laugh. She's so "out there." Her story was good but ridiculously tame. I was shocked it was so normal and told her so! Then there is "Curly" who sits on the other side of me and she is one of the only other people in the room that I actually know her name because she sits by me. She liked my story and complimented in greatly in one of our small group pre-workshops so I like her. :) Her story was a fun read. It was cute and sweet and funny and kept me into it. Then there is "Mr. Pretentious Ass." He is one of the two boys in the class. I think he looks like Napoleon Dynamite and that's like all I can think when I look at him. But he is like the little class mascot because he's such a novelty and has more personality than the other boy in the class who sits quietly in the corner and I think just prays the estrogen in the room won't attack him. Mr. Pretentious Ass always has much to say. He got his name because my Mag sent me a note in class and said "blank is a Pretentious Ass." So that's what I'm gonna call him. His story was actually really good, and of course followed mine on the day of workshop. Ok, so plenty of background for the workshop I think. And by the way, if you want to read the story that got torn to shreds in this class, I can probably send it to you. So here goes "ginnie's train of thoughts through her horrible workshop." It might be hard to follow cause you weren't there and it's just my train of thoughts..... but maybe you can get through it.

Ok, I can't breathe. I had to read the first paragraph and now I really can't breathe and I didn't take my beta blocker last nite so I'm fairly certain my heart will now shoot through my chest and land on my paper on my desk and boy won't that just add to the scene.
This is excrutiating. I'm just going to write and write so i can look down the whole time.
things people said work in the story: familiar idea (bottletrees), Mrs. Ford (static character...huh??), it's not forceful but holds attention, narrative voice and its assertiveness that needs to continue. Need more sass rest of story. Got lost in there somewhere (hey, now I thought we were still supposed to be talking about positives!)
ok, people aren't jumping up to give out positives, things they liked.
Said description of husband and relationship, descriptions in general
Ok now Dr. Skinny asks for things that can be improved. oh hell.

sounded like an autobiography or excerpt from. too much inner dialogue. inner conflict. not enough set up of inner turmoil. what is she afraid of in taking down art? is she in fear of bad coming back?
More backstory, what happened in breakdown, etc
too interior and not dynamic enough.
Mag just leaned over and wrote "doo doo" on my notebook. makes me smile. i guess the tension is now radiating off of me.
speakers are redundant--- use space for backstory. choose one neighbor as representative
I feel like I'm gonna cry.
her feelings on council/mayor
Now Mag leans in and writes "don't think about penises" and Dr. Skinny now calls us out. She says, "LADIES." Mag looks up and says, "I'm writing her notes on her paper," Dr. Skinny answers with, "I know but you are distracting me." Now Dr. Skinny has never called out anyone in class. So this is not a good way to hope that no one is noticing me. Dammit. I just sit there, and I had never answered Mag's "notes."
What is a bottletree? lots of people don't know what a bottletree is. HUH????
Conflict sooner.... didn't understand what was going on, trial, etc
First name needed, her name seems formal and she's not, description of the protagonist, even of her change, chose to describe others throughout but not self.
Ending wasn't satisfying - either get mad or something- she conformed too easily. Why??
How far in healing process? maybe complies bc she's far enough removed from it that she knows she doesn't need the stuff.
change to happen gradually throughout story
i'm gonna puke now
prompted by something---point of change---could use husband's look
add more, not really take anything out
drug rehab steps??? wha??? the apologize step?? oh like earl. ha ha ha.
bottletrees description was choppy and miss superiority who is better than everyone else didn't follow. (it was not.) She says that narrator says there are 7 but only counts 5 in the description. she's wrong. Dr. Skinny attempts to point out that there are descriptions of 7 but miss superiority seems to not notice someone might be telling her she's wrong. Miss superiority is really confused because she doesn't know what a bottle tree is. might need better description. Dr. Skinny asks for show of hands of how many people know what a bottletree is. Only half, maybe more raise hands. Who doesn't know what a bottletree is? These people need to get out of house more. Are they from the south??? good lord.
I need liquor. and possibly a cigarette at this point. (and so Curly is apparently reading what I'm writing over my shoulder. so she busts out with, out loud, "Do you really??" I look at her and ask her what's she talking about. She says, "do you really need liquor and a cigarette??" I reach over and mock slap her ..... "HUSH!" she says she felt exactly same way day of hers. again, let's draw attention to me.)
Mr. Pretentious Ass talks about remembering an acid trip fondly but that this is a recovery story. HUH??? Oh my gosh. they think the whole story is drug related. Well crap. Maybe leave out acid reference? just lights maybe.
Miss superiority asks about kids. says story implies she has more but she only mentions one. why she have to ask that?? why was that important. i only mention one that is important to story, you idiot
Dr. Skinny has on pink shoes today.
Ok we're done with my story. I realize that Miss Superiority has completely marked up my paper with a pink pen. pink. and has totally re-written some of my lines cause she's so much smarter than me.
Ok Mr. Pretentious Ass's story is up. Oh everyone loves it. They just talk and laugh and smile! well shit.
Miss Superiority just HAS to reference herself being in Australia. how in the crap does she get that in???
Of course, Mr. Pretentious Ass has questions for the class. Of course.


Ok, so yeah. That was it. It really was much more horrible than it comes across. Sorry for the PG rating too by the way.
Ok well in the time i've written this blog Josh has: smashed a banana all over himself and floor. pooped his diaper. poured a cup of water on the ottoman. put 15 crayons in the cup with an eighth of an inch of water in it. used an orange crayon to color on the armoire. busted the gate down to get out of the living room. shaked his booty to Dora and loved it. used the colors to poke fat cat til she gets up and leaves without biting or swiping at him because she has far more patience than i do.
So now I have to go. gotta change a diaper and clean up smushed banana with water now dripping on it.